Disorder

When your mind goes

You sit there at half past four

The television is in black and white

 you want to leave

yet seem to be glued to the chair

And when it's not the chair its the crippling bed

 The pillow speaks to you

Says

Not today, tomorrow.

Tomorrow comes along

 its the same song

Not today tomorrow

Dreadful bed

And its mischievous friend

Pillow

Not today tomorrow

E

I admit
from time to time
I wonder where we'd
be right now

I usually draw a blank
It's not something
I've experienced before

I wanted it to happen
with you

I wanted to be a
grown up woman with you
I wanted a mature relationship

 Not just groping in the
backseat of a car

I wanted you to
meet my mom

I was so happy
I smiled

My mistake
It's always
my fault

You could've said Goodbye